It's fine

"i'm not ready for a relationship right now"

Why does anybody even say this anymore? Who does it fool? I hope that everybody is on the same page here. That statement means that the other person does not want you. They are totally ready for a relationship, just not with you.

Here's what should have been said:

“I want to date someone who isn’t you.”

“Look, I just got out of a long-term relationship and I kind of need to slut it up for a while.”

“Work’s been hell lately and I think I could probably bang somebody way hotter.”

“Please leave me alone, you terribly clueless doting weirdo.”

-Calling Bullshit on: I'm Not Ready For A Relationship Right Now

He says: “I don’t know what I want.”

He means: I know exactly what I want and it’s not you. Or: I honestly don’t know what I want and have an extremely difficult time expressing and explaining my emotions to others. Or: I’m torn between you and another girl I possibly want more.

-Truth: He's Just Not That Into You

I mean, okay, that's totally fine if you don't want to be in a relationship with me. About 100% of the people I currently know, don't want to be in a relationship with me  & I still really really like around 75% of them. I don't need anyone to tell me what they think I want to hear.



I don't even know why this is affecting me.  But now I can't listen to Motion City without feeling queasy.

I can tell when I'm extra emotional

Because I always get a whopping zit on my chin. Or my forehead. Or my cheek. This time's my chin though.

I just ugly cried to this video.

The funniest thing happened tonight. MJ & I went out to eat with one of her friends (he is actually one of my friends too) & after we had finished our dinner, we all went to our cars. He drives a little neon now & he had unlocked his car with his key then we just stood around & said our goodbyes for a few minutes. MJ & I go to get in my car because we're going to go to yogurttime. We get in & rave about how much we like the guy & then Melissa turns to look out the window at him, she busts out laughing. He had gotten into his car and was looking around for his key to start the ignition. It was still in his door!!!

"You've been on cloud 9 for so long, but it can't always be so sweet & sometimes you need to realize that ... Face the facts of life and know that this is just a lesson of life."
I learn this simple fact over and over again.

How to

You know how sometimes when you get really tickled, you throw your head back and cackle at the sky? Oh you don't do that? Because you're not an insane person? Well I do that. I don't even notice when I'm doing it until I've hit my head on something. I did that recently. In front of 4 or 5 of my friends. It was an awkward situation, but only for a moment. Like it felt like 3 hours, but the moment probably lasted about 4 & 1/2 seconds. I was laughing and hit my head on the back of my metal chair. I shocked my self & immediately stopped laughing. Then I forgot to say "oh shit that hurt" because of the shock. Then there was a look of brief concern from a friend to the right of me. Which probably freaked me out more than the actual hit to my head. I don't much like for other people to feel bad for me, without my permission.

So what is a normal, nice enough person supposed to say to a couple who is about to have a baby? "Congratulations"? That doesn't sound right, but that's what I said at a co-workers baby shower yesterday. I honestly still don't know what the polite thing to say is.

Mike Falzone is the smartest, most handsomest, lovliest person I've Never met.

Aww Coop

I really love Nurse Jackie, but I think there's some continuity issues. Coop has not grabbed any boobs since first season. I don't know if I've just missed a few episodes where he got help for his boob grabbing problem or what.

What are the chances

So sad. My favorite blogger(the hilarious, handsome one) that went on hiatus 2 months ago, made his blog invitation only :(   :(   :(
I am genuinely upset about this & I would contact the author of said blog, if only I knew how.

So here's a thing that happened yesterday.
MJ, Jenner, Jenner's fiance Stav, & I went to Arby's in Gadsden to get Stav something for dinner. MJ, Jenner, & I had already eaten so we weren't getting anything from Arby's. Jenner's first thought was to go through the drive thru, but the Stav was like NO NO NO I will just go inside. Jenner then whips into a parking spot & Stav  goes inside. Totally normal. Then a little red toyota pulls up next to us & GUESS WHO IT IS. IT IS DR. G.
IN GADSDEN. AT ARBY'S. PARKED NEXT TO OUR CAR. I noticed him immediately, obviously. I had a freaking class with the guy, 3 days of the week. So I stage whispered to MJ & Jenner, "Look! That's Dr. G! That's him! That's Dr. G!"
Needless to say, I did not get out of the car to greet him. I mean, how could I pull that off, while still looking cool. Also, it was beginning to sprinkle. Also, it's not like I'll never see this dude again; I have his class next semester. He & I are like kindred spirits, so I felt like I knew that he didn't want to be approached by his students. Just like if I was a professor, I wouldn't want to be approached by one of my annoying students.
One day last week, my Jefe said that she saw him at quiznos (or maybe it was subway) & she smiled & he made no acknowledgement of her existence. She chalked it up to him being a buttface(she holds a grudge because he's an Apple fanboy & she would rather jump off a cliff than use an apple product), but I don't think that's the case. He's just not a warm & cuddly person. Honestly though, he may not have even noticed her.

Happy as Larry

"Boring as bat-shit you people make me feel so
Curious and I don't know why
You think you'll end up in the sky"

This song is about living your life like you're happy to be here on earth RIGHT NOW. I think the song is kind of laughing in the face of people who are just waiting around to die & go to heaven. I like this song a lot.

Like I said earlier, I read Mindy Kaling's book. It was okay. I really liked a few bits. Por exjemplo, when she was talking about how she just wants a dude that won't want her to convert religions because she is going to forever stay a culturally Hindu, extremely superstitious, Christmas tree putter upper, or something to that effect. I would quote it word for word, but I'm at work right now & I left my copy of the book at home. Because I was finished with it, obviously. I liked what she said though.

That reminds me... I want to remember to purchase the Holy Grail for my madre.

don't stress that's dumb

I've been doing a lot of reading lately and not much else. I have a lot of WIPs that I need to finish & lots of shows that are on the DVR that I need to hurry up and watch & I really need to learn binary and hex before fall semester starts. You would think that I'd be eager to watch my shows, but I can't watch 99% of them while my grandparents are in the room because it makes me uncomfortable. Probably makes them uncomfortable, too.

But reading. I've actually been doing that. I just finished Mindy Kaling's book. It was okay. I finished Tina Fey's book the night before last. It was good. They both kind of had the same premise. If I had to pick one of these two to recommend, I'd pick Tina Fey's. She made a lot of good points about life, as she reflected on her own. I was trying to explain to Caleb how Tina Fey was saying that there's no such thing as comedy for men and comedy for women. It's all the same. The things that women laugh at and the things that men laugh at are the same. He didn't get it. He needs to just read Bossypants, then he'll be like OH I GET IT.
She made another point many times in the book, that I don't think applies to my earlier statements, but anyway she was saying how, a lot of times people will think something crazy, but because it makes sense to them, people will continue to think it's true. This reminded me a lot of the stuff that we discussed in Dr. G's. Like, because my generation and generations before me lived through 9/11, we will always be a little bit panicky about terrorists, but when you look at the math... we're more likely to die in a car accident or by godzilla or something. I mentioned electromagnetic pulse in his class one day & he was like, REALLY?!?! You believe in THAT?? Then he said something about all of us will probably accidentally drown in our own toilets before that happens.

Paciente

"If they're fast zombies, then I'm just going to kill myself  'cause that's bullshit. But if they're slow, dumb zombies then I'm good." -Unidentified source aka my little brother
He said this the other day when MS was over, in one of his saner, happier, more hilarious moments. Sometimes he gets so blood-boiling angry & I can't tell if it's because he's a fifteen year old boy or if it's because he's been dealt some fucked up genetics. Either way, he needs to get that shit locked down.

This past Saturday, I spent almost 7 full hours with J & our other friend(for the sake of this post we'll call him Ned) & it was a pretty nice time. We saw Snow White & the Huntsman (Super good) and then that night we went to the cigar box festival (Meh). I'm just super glad that Clairey D was able to go. I'm not sure what I thought a "cigar box festival" could be, but I just didn't expect it to literally be only cigar box guitars.
It was fun times until I got back to my house & realized that my license had somehow escaped the confines of my blue jeans pocket. I have the feeling that it popped out on one of the many occasions that I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket during one of the many cigar box guitar performances. My case has this rubbery feel to it so I can imagine that my license clung to it for dear life & then made a quick getaway once it was free. What sucks is that I didn't realize it was gone until I got home to my house. If I had realized sooner then J, Ned & I could have scavenged the Flying Monkey & then I wouldn't have had to lie to my grandparents about where I was today. I lie all the time & I feel like this was one of my more harmless lies. When I arrived at G&P's, I had just driven 2 hours without my license & I really didn't want to say, Oh by the way I lost my license on saturday so I'm going to skip work tomorrow & pay $18.50 to get a new one. I know it doesn't seem like a big deal AT ALL & it really isn't, but I just don't like feeling anxiety & sometimes I go to drastic measures to avoid anxiety. I was brought up on the philosophy, "ask for forgiveness not permission." Also, "not my fault" is a popular philosophy from my household. I never said it was the right philosophy.

It really was the luckiest timing for me to lose my license(if there even is a lucky time to lose stuff) because MJ & Jenner were off work today. Alabama state workers have Jefferson Davis' birthday off. Weird, but okay. So they came with me to the courthouse so that I could purchase a replacement license so that I could stop driving illegally. Thank baby jesus that they came because the lady said she needed somebody from the courthouse that could identify me. I was like, Bro I'm from Madison... I don't know anybody here. My cuz works for the state tho, does that count? & after some hubbub the lady finally gave me a temporary license. I think she gave me grief because I didn't have my birth certificate with me, but who carries that shit around?!?

When I was chauffeuring Jenner & MJ around, I got behind this really slow guy & Jenner was like, wow you are really patient. I'm not, but I thought that was really nice of her to say.

Ode to Jake Johnson

You are so handsome
Seriously
You are the best at acting
All of your movies are gems
Even Paper Heart, which sucked
Imdb says that you are 5'10''
Let's pretend that you're way taller
Let's pretend that you're not married
And that you are madly in love with me
Because you are so adorable
The end

This blog has taken a classy turn, now hasn't it?

I'm being facetious. Woo big words.

I can't remember where I heard this quote from...
"My opinions are fluid, not concrete"
But I like it.


Rosh should be in Africa by now. Not Ghana yet,  but somewhere in Africa.

I'm the goddamn batman

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ROSHNI

Rosh is twenty one today. (:

madtown

Blogging while in a bad mood is probably a bad choice. Guess who care about making good choices?
I haven't been outside in probably 3 or 4 days & I'm okay with that. I've gained about 6 pounds since I've been home... really excellent. Is it paranoid to think my friends are avoiding me? Or am I the one avoiding them? I can't tell. This paragraph is going to make me really popular with the dudes, I just know it. They're all going to want to wife this.
I've been reading a lot of books in kindle form & it's my new favorite thing. I can see why people think regular books are on their way out. The only think is, I think the editors for kindle books are too lacks about errors because there are way more errors in kindle than in published form.
Weeds is turning out to be a good show. Netflix is a a great invention. "I would like to touch intimately the person who thought of that" -Win a Date With Tad Hamilton

Coley, my love

Everything anybody's ever wanted to know

• 1: What eye color do you find sexiest? Let's face it: brown eyes are the sexiest.
• 2: White, milk, or dark chocolate mocha? Milk chocolate
• 3: If you could get a Sharpie tattoo on your back, what would it be? Original art by Banksy himself. I would get a real back tattoo of that, actually.
• 4: Did you grow up in a small or big town? Did you like it? 2 small towns, in proportion to the rest of America. I guess I liked it just fine. 
• 5: Your favorite adult as a child? (and not your parents, if they were your favorite) Roald Dahl. He wrote all of my favorite childhood books and movies.
• 6: What kind of smoothie sounds really good right now? Oh snap, one of those delicious triple berry ones from Paradise Smoothie.
• 7: Most embarrassing moment from your elementary school years? Probably farting in class. Or throwing up on the bus while we were on a field trip to the space and rocket center.
• 8: Most embarrassing moment from your middle school years? I can't remember if this was middle or high school, but I'll go with middle school. Showing up to Mic's christmas party on the wrong day. Or farting in class.
• 9: Most embarrassing moment from your high school years? All of the events that involve AJ. Or slipping on ice in the parking lot. Or slipping by the pool at a state swim meet in front of a million goddamn people & nobody helped me.
• 10: Pirates or ninjas? Why? Pirates. Because of the drunkenness.
• 11: Have you ever climbed a tree more than twenty feet off the ground? Hail no.
• 12: Did you like swinging as a child? Do you still get excited when you see a swing set? I liked swinging, but I don't get emotional when I see a set. 
• 13: If you could have any pet in the world, illegal or not, what would you get? Giraffe.
• 14: What's your most favorite part of your body? My hands. I don't think they are pretty, but they let me be the creative person that I am. I have very steady hands and I'm able to draw things and knit things and paint things because of it. I like feeling textures and tapping rhythms with my fingertips. Also, hands are very instrumental in baking, which is a passion of mine.
• 15: What's your most favorite part of your personality? The awesome part.
• 16: Madonna or Lady Gaga? Neither? Both? Who cares? Uh.... Madge because of Bridget Jones 2
• 17: Have you ever watched the Superbowl all the way through? No
• 18: Have you ever watched any major sporting event drunk? No
• 19: What's the most delicious food you've ever eaten in your life? There was this dish from olive garden that I dream about sometimes & I desperately wish I knew the name of it. It was the cheesiest thing I'd ever had. 
• 20: Margarine or butter? Which did you grow up with? Butter & butter.
• 21: Whole, skim, 1%, or 2% milk? (Did you know they make 1 1/2% milk?) 2%'s my go-to.
• 22: Which continents have you been on? North America
• 23: Do you get motion sickness? Any horror stories? No, I do not. This one time on the bus though, I thought Rosh was forreal going to pass out & it was probably motion sickness.
• 24: Backpacks or satchels? Bookbags, nigga.
• 25: Would you wear a rainbow jacket? A neon yellow sweater? Checkered pants? All yes.
• 26: What was your favorite cartoon growing up? Chip & Dale Rescue Rangers.
• 27: If you had to have a cow or a pig, which would you take? Why? Pig because cows have giant poops.
• 28: If you had to look at one city skyline for the rest of your life, which would it be? Nashville with the Batman building.
• 29: Longest plane ride you've ever been on? 0 hours.
• 30: The latest you've ever slept? I've probably slept a full 24 hours.
• 31: Would you buy a sweater covered in kitten pictures? Would you wear it if someone gave it you for free? I would buy it if it was on sale. I would probably wear it all the time.
• 32: Do you pick at scabs? Unfortunately, yes. Causes scars so don't do it.
• 33: Favorite kind of bean? Kidney? Black? Pinto? Black beans.
• 34: How far can you throw a baseball? Maybe 6 feet.
• 35: If you had to move to another country, where would you move? England
• 36: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? Vietnamese? Korean? Nepalese? How was it? I have not, but I would love to try.
• 37: Small, liberal arts school or public university? Why? I am going to a public university because I have poor money management skills and did not save money from all of those years working so I could not get an apartment to move away so I'm able to live close to home.
• 38: A relationship with love or one with sex? LOVE
• 39: Do you eat enough vegetables? Yes, actually.
• 40: Do you like horror movies? How about thrillers? No. Yes.
• 41: Would you scratch a crotch itch in public? No
• 42: Do you swear in front of your parents? Yes. This is a recent development.
• 43: Coolest thing you've ever been for Halloween? Pumpkin guts.
• 44: If you could change your natural hair color, would you? To what? Yeah I do that all the time. It's been red and black on different occasions & those're not my natural color.
• 45: Do you want to get married? Have kids? Yes and yes.
• 46: Do you use a reusable water bottle? If not, you should. I do. Sometimes.
• 47: City or nature person? Neither? I like the burbs.
• 48: Have you ever used something other than "makeup" as makeup? (Like paint? Markers?) Can't say that I remember ever doing that.
• 49: Can you walk well in high heels? Even if you're a guy? No I walk like an idiot in heels.
• 50: Post 5 awesome things about yourself. BRAG AWAY! 1. I have a tendency to be very generous. 2. Sometimes I am super witty. 3. I try to see the best in people. 4. I am good at desserts. 5.  I'm awesome at arts & crafts.

Thor, Iron Man, Ant-Man, Wasp and Hulk

Marvel.com  so it's got to be legitimate.


Eating donuts cause it's late at night & I can. I will do a workout video tomorrow, I swear.

*Note to self: Remember to finish Skins

"I won't let love disrupt, corrupt, or interrupt me"

Turns out that I'm a lot more racist than I thought I was

Hipster Racism

Ada Lovelace, OG of CS

I would totally read my future daughter(or son) a bedtime story about 'imagination and science.' --

"Stratford says he wants to give young girls like his daughter "actual historical role models that show them that math and science and imagination are incredible tools that can shape their world." And he's chosen as his two heroines Mary Shelley, of "Frankenstein" fame -- the world's first science fiction writer, he calls her -- and Ada Byron, whom some regard as the world's first computer programmer."

Steve Job's biographer plans to write about the history of digital information--

"Lovelace certainly deserves the recognition. Born Augusta Ada Byron in 1815, she never met her father — her parents parted ways right after she was born. Instead, she was raised by her smart and strong-willed mother, Anne Isabella Milbanke. Noted for her intellect, Annabella, as she was known, was dubbed by Byron as “The Princess of Parallelograms.”"

People who are trying to kill themselves with food

I always forget to draw the eyebrows when I'm drawing. Sometimes I forget the ears, too.

Summer officially begins on Thursday & I'm totally excited. I'm having lots of anxiety about making it through my final tomorrow, though. Dr. G has basically taken pity on me & gave me a really decent grade on the "penultimate" exam. Such a nerdy password he did for that one. I didn't find out what that word meant until Saturday while watching Supernatural.  I doubt that's where he got it from.
I wonder if I could manage to go facebookless during the summer. I mean, I know I CAN, but I don't do well with constraints. My friend MS manages full-time without one so... surely I can do it for a measly 3 months.

"I'm nothing if not a trend jumper on-er to-er"

Yoda one for me

I was just thinking about a moment last week that I had thought was hilarious, & I want to remember it.

This (kind of) friend of mine was telling MJ how he was sorry for puking in her sink, but he couldn't figure out the R2D2 trash can. 

It's not you, it's me

Maybe it really is me though. I'm going to get a tattoo soon that says LOVERS ARE LUNATICS.

But anyway

I give up on that #PHOTOADAYAPRIL thing. Rosh should be pleased. :P JK bro

I am still unbelievably tired from Sunday's kayaking/canoeing expedition. I'm blogging to document when the events transpired so that when I look back on this blog I can remember the muscle tightening and flesh burning effects of that day. I am nothing if not dramatic.

I think this photo was probably staged, but it really encapsulates Ellen DeGeneres's closing statement on her show everday, "Be kind to one another." Also, you should never take yourself too seriously. (Note to self.)

I'm the worst

Some days I crave praise and attention. Like on one of those days, I'll get a compliment & be like Fuck yeah I'm awesome. Other days I'm like, Fuck you what do you know about me. I hope everybody's like that & it's not just me. I'm feeling pretty shitty right now. For no reason, too. Because I had a pretty excellent day. Mostly.

I am the most awkward though. I can't even discuss the details on this blog because I'm so embarrassed. Rosh, it involves AJ, of all people. Bah.

I'm trying to keep my shit together for the last few weeks of class, but I'm scared I might fail my CS class so obviously I'm not doing anything to prevent that. Just going to stress about it until it actually happens. I never practice like I should. Isn't that weird how that's the only class I care about & it's the class I try the least in. WTF.

MS gave me this little nugget of wisdom that I really like, "I can see why you like him still, but you do need to be careful. School and work come first." It's plainly obvious what she's referring to, the fact that I'm being stupid & needy over a dude. That's why I love her though. We keep each other sane.

This is what I'm most afraid of:

You know how on most laptops, there's a little scrolly thing that lets you scroll? Mine has all of a sudden discontinued working. Oh wait, it works now.

I just want to say that Calub is still my superhero. I want to go where he is. I would get on a plane tomorrow if I didn't only have $17 in my checking account.

My tooth hurts so goddamn bad. I think the tooth I had a root canal on, fucked up the position of the tooth behind it & now it's all out of whack in there.

I am so awkward

GOD

Where you ate breakfast

where i ate breakfast

I did not do this shit on purpose. I had my blueberries in a little baggie on my lap & when I was on my way to work this morning, I pressed on the gas & all the blueberries spilled out everywhere. What a bitch.

Cold

cold

It's cold as shit outside. It was hot as hell not even two days ago & now I can't stand outside for a minute without freezing.

Tiny Furniture

"Worth a google/googol" *play on words

I probably just found my new favorite movie.
I might have to watch it again today. It's hilarious. And totally realistic. I totally don't understand it, but I love it.

I'm super excited that about Lena Dunham's new show, "Girls."
She's my hero.

Younger You

younger me

I wanted to wear GI Joe's shoes so much. So so much.

Inside Your Wallet

inside my wallet

There's nothing in there.

Shadow

shadow

Isn't photo editing neat?

bloggity blog

This guy. This guy right here. Dry humor! Uses the word pretentious! He does that thing where he tags posts with funny comments he makes about the post!

Lunch

lunch

Posting from the future again. This is my Uncle's plate from lunch on Easter sunday (April 8, 2012). I forgot to take a picture of my own plate so I took one of his plate, obviously. He pretty much got some of everything. G's creamed corn, lima beans,  & deviled eggs, T&D's peas & cornbread, Papaw's mashed potatoes, G&P's spiral ham, B&L's mac & cheese, & G&P's salad. Pretty good.

Baby I Got Yo Money

Say Anything <3



This was a top comment on one of the videos... "Music is like candy, throw away the rappers." 
Hilarious. I totally don't agree because I love rap, but hilarious nevertheless. Puns, yo.

Tiny

tiny

Have you ever been to Logan's? They have teeny tiny little desserts. It was delicious though.

someone who makes me happy

someone who makes you happy

Phillip!!! I'm posting from the future because I didn't have a good picture of someone that made me happy on April 4th so I waited until I had a good one & it just so happened to happen today (Friday, April 6th).
MJ, Mall, & I went to First Friday today, which is this little festival thing that happens on Broadstreet in Gadsden where the people of Etowah county go to gawk and stare at the weirdos that decide to show up(that's what I do anyway). Also, there's usually some food & charity stuff going on.
Anyway, back to the photo... that's my hairdresser, Phillip. He's also my grandmother's, my aunt's, two of my cousins' & my boss's hairdresser. He is just the sweetest man. I love him to bits. He's a huge nerd, too. So awesome.

Needless to say, he makes me happy.

Mail

mail

Rate My Professor

DOT COM
I've been trying to pick out my classes for fall & I just had to see what my fellow peers had to say about Dr. G. I can see why he thinks those review sites are so pointless & annoying. I am cracking up. There are some reviews from '03 that are obviously written by girls. I'm noticing a trend in all of the reviews, they all have to do with whether or not the reviewer liked him & they say almost nothing about the course.
I don't know though... I definitely judge a class by the teacher. So hypocrite = me.

Music Snob

You know I hate the word obsession, but all of the synonyms on the internet are sub par. Passionate is a strange word. I've been doing some research on Walk the Moon & they are everything I love about music. Their music is upbeat & kind of nonsensical & the lead singer is good looking. Also, they recently went on tour with one of my other favorite bands, Young the Giant.

I try not to be a music snob, but I totally am. My music stomps all other music.

Walk the Moon's doing a performance in Cincinnati, OH on record store day & it would only take 6 hours to get there!

Your Reflection

your reflection

I found this photo thing yesterday (April 2nd) so I'm doing some time travel and posting from the past. Also, instagram emailed me today & said that the app for android is now here! Yay 

Today's photo is not from instagram because I took the photo prior to the email & for some reason instagram doesn't like the size of my already taken photos so I can't upload them there & get the cool hipster vintage look.

"Gee, that Annabelle makes such good decisions"

is not a common phrase.

Photo a Day April