When will I have perspective?

"The key to good design is a heaping dose of give a shit topped off by hard work, skill and craft, with a dollop of humor and a sprinkle of compassion and humility. (Talent is also helpful.)" --CSA


I have this one prof who starts sentences sometimes like "So do you guys know about [insert design thing here]?" or "Have you guys heard about [insert another design thing here]?" And it's super funny to me that he always asks, every time, because the answer is always no. I think students at JSU have just become lazy, or we have always been lazy and we haven't grown out of it. That's one major problem I've been having with graphic design. It seems like if you want to be any good at all, you can't relax for even one second. Because if you relax, you miss something very important in the graphic design world, and you will always be in a never-ending game of catch up. Not that relaxing is the same thing as laziness. Sometimes it is. Maybe I'm just not used to this level of intensity that accompanies graphic design. Maybe I'm over thinking again.

Will I be cut out for this after college? A friend of mine told me the other day that I'm a lazy overachiever. How that is possible, I have no idea. I mostly just feel lazy. And overwhelmed. These situations keep happening to me where I feel like if I don't do it, nobody will. And I am not a leader. I am much more comfortable following directions. How do I continue to be helpful while also encouraging others to lead? I don't know. This seems whiny.

My cousin came by the house yesterday and we had a conversation about how, when she turned 30, she stopped doing things she didn't want to do. When she was in her twenties, she accepted every invitation and joined every club and took every opportunity as it happened. This is exactly what I'm going through right now in my twenties and I'm split between loving the busy-ness and feeling over run. I suppose there's something to look forward to at 30.