Don't trust a perfect person and don't trust a song that's flawless

I've watched quite a few videos of 21 pilots live performances and I've noticed that Josh Dun is so bouncy.


I have those after birthday blues. I don't know what it is. Maybe I build my birthday up too much and when it happens it never lives up to expectations. I mean, I know that nothing lives up to expectations, so I'm not sure why I'm surprised every year. It's not even that bad. I'm just being whiny.

You know it really bothers me when people say that you have to be "open" to having a relationship and to "not worry"and to just "ignore it" and it'll happen. One of my best friends is funnily having interactions with my handsome co-worker and I simultaneously hate her and want to be her. I don't really hate her. I could never. She should hate me actually. I'm a terrible friend. I'm very dramatic today.

I want to have a friend that tells me if my profile picture looks like me. I don't really care if I look good; I want to look realistic. I want to look how I look on a normal day-to-day.

College starts back on wednesday and I didn't get anything done related to my portfolio. Bah.

summer vacation

Staying at a hotel, or I mean staying in this hotel room, has made me realize how strangely similar it is to your own house, but things have been worn down in ways that you don't know about, by strangers.

Staying with G in a room is not as bad as I had assumed. She snores just a bit. The thing that's annoyed me the most has been her asking if I've locked the car doors every time we get out of the car. I've since asked her to stop that and she was only a little butthurt about it.

I felt embarrassed when we ate at Panini Pete's today because I had some chair problems. The kind of chairs they had were plastic patio chairs and as I was sitting on it, the legs started bowing out from underneath me. I hoped that it wasn't noticeable, but I was self conscious about it and I think I heard this family talking about it. Then when we were standing outside and I was waiting on G to get done in the bathroom, I heard one of the waitstaff say to another, "Yeah, that one needs a wipe down. It just had two glasses. And probably a new chair." That was shitty.

A lady at an art gallery saw my Einstein shirt and recommended a biography on Einstein by Walter Isaacson. She also recommended his book on Steve Jobs.

I haven't gotten a sunburn and that's all that really matters.

Consecutive

Doing 'Daily Things' is hard. I'm as consecutive as the weather is good. Does that sentence make sense? I'm like the weather.

My 100 day project has been neglected, but I'm going to finish it by September 8th. I'm going to! Maybe. I might give up. But I feel guilty about it.

I also have this 5 year journal that I haven't written in since June 18. So there's that. It's not that bad because I usually just go back through and fill in stuff with the help of social media and texts and random photos I took. Then I make stuff up for the rest of the days. But that's a while back.
I am supposed to be working on a very professional logo for my cousin-in-law. I was asked to do it probably around a year and a half ago. I was kind of hoping he forgot, but he just asked about it again recently. I don't know what I'm doing.
And I feel that way most of the time now. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I'm doing on that project. I don't know what I'm doing with my life. I don't know what I'm doing with my hair. I'm constantly overwhelmed. I constantly feel like I'm agreeing to help people and then disappointing them. Very spiral-y. 

retrospect

Thoughts from spring 2015 semester, now that it's waaay in the rear view mirror.

*Now, I notice type, logos, & packaging on everything. I can't tell if I love that or hate that. No, wait, yes I absolutely love it. I just have to remember that literally only other graphic designers get excited about those things. Every one else gives no shits.
*I have no idea how I would get anything done without social media. I know the internet gets a bad wrap for being a distraction, but after this semester, I have a new appreciation. There were so many times that I needed to get in touch with somebody from class and I just looked to see if anyone was online. It really made me remember all those times I stayed up on AIM in middle school.
*Also, that social media thing is a double edged sword. Sometimes I dream about going dark and cutting ties with the internet, but it would really hurt me because I couldn't get in touch with anyone I need to for school.
*I am constantly struggling to be creative. I want to keep the vigor going from the semester, but I also want to slow down because the semester was crazypants.
*I'm completely scared to graduate. Last semester felt so real. I was and still feel completely unprepared. There are so many things.

Here are some arts from my favorite professor's classes:

As far as I could tell, we were allowed almost free reign on our projects. They had to be based on a piece during the art period we studied. Otherwise, anything. Any art medium. I made A's in all his classes so I guess I did it right. Every single one of these, I put on the back burner and finished them at the very last minute. Almost all of them turned out so much better than I could've hoped and probably even better than anything from any of my other classes.

My first project from Dr. J's class was this cactus guy. I have him sitting on top of a shelf in my room and every time a newbie walks into my room, they comment on how creepy he is. It's not his fault. He's a Cactus Man! (Based on Redon's Cactus Man.) He's the only one of his kind. He is just lonely.
The other is a master copy painting of a Mondrian that I can't remember the name of and some sugar cookies I made based on another Mondrian. I spent a lot of time making the sugar cookies and then I was worried that Prof J would be displeased with the medium of baked goods so I hastily painted the other piece.

I know I already posted this one, but for the sake of continuity, here it is again. '2 Hearts'

These two are the same painting. Based on a still from Repo Man.

This skeleton finished up my personal skeleton theme I had going last semester. It's a super poorly done master copy of De Humani Corporis. I am actually super embarrassed about these two because they are so crappy. The vader one is a simplified movie poster. 

 My De Palma pieces. A stationary package for Swan from Phantom of the Paradise and the birthday cake from Sisters. This was another case where I wanted to just use the cake as my project, but since I just bought the cake from a bakery, I wasn't sure if it would count so I just threw together the stationary package. When I got to class that day and showed my project, Prof J was like, 'why did you bring 2 things? You could have just brought one.'

Hello old friend

I am making my triumphant return to blogging. I have missed you so.


Recently at a party I went to, someone that I met brought up that it's weird how close graduates of Bob Jones still are. Are all graduates of BJHS this close? Is it just 2009? I wouldn't say we are all as close as we were in those days, but I wouldn't hesitate to invite any of my high school friends out to eat, or to a party, or anywhere really. This guy should be so glad that we BJHS graduates are so friendly that we would be friends with the likes of him, or something.
I noticed at parties that people like to ask who you know at the party and how you know them. And at this particular party, because I didn't go to college where the rest of them did, my only connection is BJHS. Like I know, who cares that we all went to the same high school.
I was snooping on a friend's text conversation and the person he was texting had asked "Pharmacy people?" and he responded, "A family friend's party." And unless my spy skills are pretty bad, (& they are so take this observation with a grain of salt.) he was referring to the party that he was at and why didn't he just say friends from high school. Is it really that taboo? Apparently it's a big faux pas.
This observation is really of no consequence to me. What else am I going to do to escape my little brother while I'm at home? Make new friends with strangers? Ha.

There was another dude at that party that apparently graduated high school with the rest of us, but I definitely felt like I was meeting him for the first time. He was like, yeah! I know you! we had a few classes together! But I did not remember this character at all. So it's not all bj graduates that are connected. It's just the people like us who spent so much time with each other during those 3 years.

the haircut

On June 19, I got the most drastic haircut of my life so far.

Right now I'm sitting at V's desk typing this post, trying not to think about the pink splotches on my best white shirt from my recent purple dye job. It's on my shirt so it's probably on my neck, too. Since it's only freaking 10:18am and I have so many more hours to go before I can crawl back into bed, here are my thoughts on my hair, 5 days gone by.

• I've spent too much money on this haircut. The haircut cost $40, I bought $10 volumizing powder & a $14 straightener. What am I doing? I don't have this kind of money! 
• I don't really like how the right side(the short side) looks, but I'm optimistic that it'll look better as it grows.
• I have no idea how to style the left side(the long side). There's too much hair there, but I don't want to cut it off because it's the only hair I've got. Maybe I can floof it up and it'll look better.
• One of my co-workers just talked to me for way longer than normal. Probably doesn't have anything to do with my hair though.
• Another co-worker talked to me less than normal. Probably because I'm an idiot that doesn't know how to use words. Ugh. Why does he have to be so cute?
• I have noticed that I touch my hair so so much when I'm nervous. I noticed because I have way less to touch now.
• I have also noticed that I'm glad that nobody seems to care about my hair. The only negative-type comment I've gotten was from my grandmother & it wasn't even bad, just kind of passive aggressive.
• My dad and bro have both said on separate occasions that I look like Lena Dunham now.
• I don't know if I actually like this haircut all that much. I might become a hat wearer. I like it okay, I guess. It's different and I love different. Sometimes I desperately just want plain long brown hair again. Sometimes.

This was after I went to supercuts to get some of the bulk shaped up.

Week 1 of 100 days

If you've been following along on my instagram, you'd know that I've been willingly participating in a form of self-imposed monotony. My summer class professor brought up the idea during the last week of class, that we should all do it. The 100 day project. It wouldn't be the actual one because that one started in April. So I decided I would do it. I gave myself until June 1st to think of something to do and then start.
I've begun to really respect the self control it takes to do something everyday. It's really hard. It sucks. But I'm doing it. I'm going to do it as long as I can. It's about the process, not the finished product. As I was deciding on a topic, I found that I really liked the projects that were pretty specific and kind of had a string of connection the whole way through. I wanted to do something that was specific, but the idea of doing something in the same style for 100 days feels so daunting right now. Maybe for the next 100. I decided to give myself the parameters of a 4.125" x 6" canvas and it's gotta say happy birthday somehow. I like switching from digital to analog and back again & I wanted to make sure I built in that flexibility into my prompt.
I really am drawn to this project because I like that I can do whatever the hell I want. I can put shitty type with shitty colors and be done. I'm very excited about that freedom. I like that it's actual "art" that isn't school related at all.

And now onto the outtakes from this week!

Day One-
I finished this one at about 11:30pm on June 1. If I hadn't already decided that I was going to follow the rules on this one, I'd probably have done it over and made the dots more even. I've got to take a better picture of this though. I discovered that when it gets dark, my room is horrible for photography. Plus I suck at photographs. I'm hoping this project forces me to get better.

Day Two-
I had this idea about spray paint and stencils. The finished postcard is definitely not how I envisioned my idea. It's okay.

Day Three-
I really need to figure out how to do this 100 days thing while still working on other creative projects that I'd like to get done over the summer. I've been spending a ton of time daydreaming about how I'll say happy birthday next. Too much time, I'd say. I saw a friend of mine this day & she said she thought I picked the perfect major for myself, which I thought was really cool of her to say.

Day Four-
It took me a long time to do the highlighter background so when I messed up on the lettering, I didn't really want to bother to re-do it.

Day Five-
DOUGHNUTS. It was national donut day plus I love doughnuts. I had to go along with the occasion. Putting the sprinkles on there took forever and it didn't even look that great. But hey, I tried. I put the sprinkles on there and took these photos, then I went to staples to get them printed on 100lb paper. I cut them to 4.125x6 and then I took another picture of the physical postcard for instagram.

Day Six-
So this was the first card where I had a person in mind like I was making it for them, instead of just a vague idea to go by. I really like how it turned out compared to the others. It makes sense because they always tell us in GD classes to design for your audience.  I roped my father into helping me take a photo. He said, "You're nuts."

Day Seven-
I must admit that this one was done a few days in advance. I bought some candies last Thursday and then I arranged them and photographed them. I got the card printed today at Office Max. For Future Reference: I've got to remember to tell the person I'm printing from to not scale the pdf.

#ever

It's 9:43 and I'm just now having supper. That's what happens when you're too excited about making an animated loading page to remember to eat. Time is passing by way too quickly. I can't believe my summer class is over tomorrow. There are so many things I wanted to do before the end! Like finish those silly class shirts.

Loading page design for my app, Donut Search Party. 

While I was fixing my dinner, I was thinking, 'yeah, I'll take a break and eat and just relax for a few minutes.' And then I caught myself editing something in illustrator.

Humphrey

Yesterday, my professor of the summer class I'm taking told me I'm awesome. It's not a huge deal because he says everything's awesome (kind of just like I do), but it is, because another guy in class kept saying that sometimes when I speak it's like I have this layer of contempt that comes out. So it proves that I can be awesome and also full of secret contempt at the same time. Livin' & lovin' that oxymoron lifestyle.

So last night I slept from 6p to 7am which was so not what I meant to do. I meant to only take a 2 hour nap. It really freaks me out that my body was so out of my control that I slept right through what I meant to do. It's crazy.

I found out recently that I really don't know when words need a hyphen.

A reoccurring theme in my GD classes is figuring out how things work and how to make them better. It's kind of annoying now because I'm constantly redesigning everything. Like who the H thought that it was a good idea to put the fan on the part of the laptop where the lap goes?! Why isn't the part that gets hot in a part of the thing that gets adequate air flow? Seems so simple, yet...

I can't tell you how glad that tomorrow is Friday. I absolutely adore my summer class. I really do. It's just that it's summer. I don't know how to do graphic design work without staying up all night because I got into that habit last semester. I don't know how to climb out of the rabbit hole. As much as I'm shocked that I slept for 13 hours, it's not really that surprising. I mean, I never sleep so sometimes I Rip-Van-Winkle. Weekends are a nice little reprieve though.

code fuzz

British boys that also sing are pretty cool. Might be my favorite thing at the moment. James Corden is perfect in this video. I'm going to download it and cut out all the Lance Bass parts so I can just watch the good James bits easily on repeat. I've got this video currently on repeat while working on stuff for my summer class. I had a lil vacation now I have to be in full speed until August, where I'll get a lil break before fall semester starts.
I also adore Ed Sheeran's new video for Photograph. I have a special place in my heart for home movies. I think a lot of people do that's why it's got 2 million views in 3 days. Ed Sheeran's a great singer and everything, but there's just something good about that nostalgia that a home movie offers.


While I'm at it, here are some more songs that are notable, as of late.

Stop, I'm Already Dead, notable because it's the theme song to iZombie. I'm so behind on episodes right now, but I'm hoping to get some things done this week to free up some time to binge watch all my shows.
Tear In My Heart by Twenty One Pilots is exactly my brand of indie alternative. I love songs with those goofy ass lyrics "The songs on the radio are okay. But my taste in music is your face." Plus they're from Ohio just like my Walk the Moon.
Oh, this cover of Shut Up and Dance by Vinyl Theatre is pretty okay. It's really too slow, but I still like it because it's a Walk the Moon song.
Every time I hear this song, I think about Battleblock Theatre because the background noises remind me of that game. And then I think about how I wish I had time to play my xbox.

Colorado Food

4/28/15 (Disclaimer: this is from ATL) Airport bagel. I woke up at 1am on the 28th and by 7am I was really hungry and knew that I couldn't wait it out until I got to Denver. I had to get some sustenance. So I picked the place with the coolest logo and bagels. Also, I purchased a subpar hot chocolate.

4/28/15 Biker Jim's! Pictured are my lovely Colorado companions for the week. None were aware of this picture. I got the wild boar dog(with apricot and cranberries) with The International(Wasabi aioli, caramelized apples and shaved lrich cddda) topping. This food & the atmosphere was really the best and really set the bar high for Colorado food.

4/28/15 This soda was available at Biker Jim's and Yellowbelly, which is exactly what I want for every restaurant. Cool sodas that taste flavor-y and handcrafted. 

4/28/15 The chicken from Yellowbelly was delish. There was this vinegar-y salsa water that went with and it was also delicious. I hoped for more from the macaroni pie, but it was still enjoyable.

4/29/15 On the morning of April 29th, KG graciously bought me a chicken taco biscuit from Taco Bell for breakfast, but I completely forgot to photograph it, even though as I was taking a shower I was deciding whether or not I would take pictures of food that also is available in Alabama & I decided that I would take a picture of all Colorado food. I just forgot.

It looked a lot like this: 

But more sloppy and misshapen.

4/29/15 I bought these in a gas station in order to be allowed to use the bathroom. No regrets. 

4/29/15 Suppertime interlude. I really think that presentation is everything and so I usually want to take a photo when food first reaches me, but again, I forgot. So now we have this massacre. It was good though. The restaurant had weird vibes, but it had a salsa bar that housed some brilliant salsa and a shit ton of cilantro that you could put on all your food like I did here. I also had no problem with the shrimp quesadilla, despite some hesitation from others in the group.

4/30/15 Blueberry mini bagels with cream cheese that I bought at King Sooper's. I'd really like to know the backstory behind this King Sooper because he spells his name funny and he is friends enough with Kroger to sell their products. Does King Sooper reign over Kroger? Probably.

 4/30/15 Things for the movie plus cough drops because I'm sickly. Not pictured: Orange chicken and noodle bowl from Panda Express.

 5/1/15 KG made pancakes! And fried eggs! And I had my own blueberry cream cheese bagels again. Those eggs were super local. I thought they tasted way better than eggland's best. Also featured is Watermelon Lime tea.

 5/1/15 This beautiful burger was from Big Daddy's Burger Bar and it was called Sam I Am. There was ham and pesto and a fried egg involved. Such a great combination. On the right are some bbq chicken nachos that featured a corn salsa and fresh pineapple. Yum.

 5/1/15 At Sweet Action ice cream, I went all out. Hey it was my vacation. I got a double scoop cup of cherry basil and butter pecan. They both tasted great, although I kinda wish I would've tried the ginger lemon cookie ice cream instead of the cherry basil. I also got a peanut butter and chocolate ice cream sandwich. As I was eating this ice cream cookie sandwich in the car, C said it smelled like a butterfinger.


 5/2/15 On my last morning in CO, KG made me a super delicious Eggs with the bread with the hole in the middle, or as they called it "Egg in the basket." I forgot to take a photo.

Day 5 in CO:

Saturday, 5/2/2015

Last day. :(

KG made breakfast again because she's just a perfect little suzy homemaker. I am very thankful because it was very delicious. I would have been thankful for the effort even if it wasn't, but it was.

We watched Bob's Burgers until it was time for me to leave. I said the briefest of goodbyes. I'm going to miss them. KG drove me to the Denver International Airport. I had no problem finding things.
When I got to the weird oval body x-ray machine, one of the security guys was like, "*shoulder shrug* It's a Friday." & I was like... "Hah *shoulder shrug*" but in my head I was thinking, 'wtf it's definitely not friday.' So that guy probably thought it was Friday for the rest of the day because I didn't correct him.

I found my gate easily. I almost fell a bunch of times on those moving sidewalks. There was a little bit of commotion while I was waiting. One of the emergency golf carts came to my gate while I was there. Lots of paramedics. It seems a little old lady had some problems on the flight before mine and had to be carried off on a stretcher.
My flight went pretty good.



I only had to use like 10 tissues the whole time. I would say that I felt bad for the person sitting next to me, but he moved at the beginning of the flight so I wasn't actually sitting next to anyone. That extra bit of space was really nice. So I kind of get the idea that fat people should have to buy two seats. The girl in my row told the flight attendant that it was the smoothest landing ever, so I guess that was good, too.
Rosh and Calub were already at the airport when I landed. I had to make them wait though because of my checked bag. From what I experienced, Denver baggage claim was way better than ATL baggage claim. It took me less than 5 minutes to get my luggage. In ATL, there were like 1000 people waiting by the carousel. What really annoyed me was that people were standing so close to the thing that if your bag came by you had to really weave through people to get it. If people just created like an empty moat surrounding the carousel then people could see their bag and jump in and grab it without hassle. Anyway, I finally got my bag. Then I traveled back to Alabama, with the help of Roshni and Caleb.

Sunset on 5/2/15

Day 4 in CO: "Saving children but not the British children"

Friday, 5/1/2015

This day was pretty leisurely. We did a lot of things, but at a casual pace. I forgot to take pictures of a lot of things.
I woke up with the snottiest of noses. I had to use about a million tissues through out the day. I was lovely to be around, I'm sure.
KG and I played with craft supplies while the boys went to Boulder. I discovered I am severely lacking in the paper punches department.
We then went to the Denver Art Museum. As everybody already knows, I love art. So of course I loved the art museum. We spent pretty much all day in the museum. The place was huge. I learned a lot about the West (Capital W). Each floor had tons of different things, but the cowboys and Indians and Native Americans really stand out in my mind. Also, the portraits. I'll have to go back to Colorado to go to the modern/contemporary art museums.
We met back up with the boys and some "friends" of theirs at Big Daddy's Burger Bar ("Aka pesto is what belongs on a burger bar" - KG). I got some great ideas for future meals from that place so I'm glad we went. I will def be putting pesto on some burgers. Also, why does pineapple and barbecue sauce taste so good together?
After that, we finally went to get some ice cream! Homemade ice cream is the best. No hyperbole. The best. Parking in Denver is very hectic.
We went back to the apartment and watched funny videos. It was good.

I love this kind of art. It's weird and it pleases me.

View of the Capitol building (the one with the gold top) from the DAM.

What made the DAM especially cool was the little studios they set up for the public. They had this one that allowed you to make your own postcards. KG and I had a great time with it. I sent postcards to everyone that I could remember the address of. This "I've never herd of buffalo" was an example of what kind of postcard you could make and it was just too perfect. There were about 12  or so stamps to choose from and then you could color them or add additions with colored pencils. I tend to like stamps on their own so I mostly just left them b&w. It was so fun though!

I think this was a postcard that someone put up on the wall of examples. I like its vaguely creepy overtones.

My new favorite thing is looking at artist's signatures and Norman Rockwell has a good one. One of my favorite pieces from the whole museum was this one of a heavenly toaster. I loved it very much.

Day 2 in CO: Bigfoot Crossing

Wednesday, 4/29/2015

KG, J & I went to Pike's Peak! It was gorgeous. We weren't allowed to drive to the top because it was still so covered in snow, but we got to go to around 12,000 feet and that still felt like a victory to me. 

Me, KG, & J

That's me on a pile of rocks that's pretty high.

J looking all all-powerful and stuff

Snow plow by the gift shop!

KG caught me #selfie

The guy in this picture is a random friend I made who took my picture when I was at a higher layer of this pile of rocks. I took a picture of him first so it was only fair. He was so sweet and gave me a restaurant recommendation that we totally ignored.

After this we all were famished so we found a very interesting mexican place to eat at. We went home and played Betrayal at House on the Hill. It was my first time playing and it went very well because I was on the winning side.

I completed this day feeling happy and a little bit sunburned.